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Recently, I've been getting a lot of private Facebook messages from baby lesbians who are freshly out of the closet and asking me all kinds of questions:"How do I date girls? I will never forget how terrified I was when I first realized I wanted to exclusively swim in the girl pond. I exerted zero effort into attracting boy creatures, but I learned quickly that I didn't really need to. It can feel wildly intimidating to be a little, vulnerable kitten tossed into a teeming cesspool of seasoned dykes.If you're new to being gay, online dating is your best friend.Don't give me the prim "I don't like dating apps" garble. I don't love dating apps either, but sh*t, it's hard to meet someone in And sadly, lesbian bars are being shut down at an alarming rate. Unfortunately for us, when we decide we prefer riding the queer train and hop off at station "Girl-On-Girl," there is no tour guide to greet us and lead the way (which is particularly sad, seeing as lesbians make for excellent tour guides). It wasn't so long ago that I was a wide-eyed young gay hungry for the answers to a slew of my pressing questions about lesbian dating. We are taught the rules of the boy-girl dating game at an early age.But girls are an entirely different kind of animal.
The average woman isn't going to ghost you because you slept with her on the first date. What's she going to do, tell her friends how "easy" you are? So here it is, kids: Zara's official dating tips for the newly out LEZ. And lesbians are so incestuous that we've all dated each other by now. There is always a lesbian art walk, or book club, or walk across the Brooklyn Bridge. I used to troll the straight bars when I was a new lez, and almost all the girls I thought were gay weren't. I just sat back and watched my straight girlfriends make out with fratty-looking boys, and I would just grow increasingly bitter and irritated and end up overdrinking and waking up depressed and hopeless and hungover. In the early days, bite the bullet and GO TO THE GAY BAR (before they shut down). But they have NO right to be offended by you hitting on them when in lesbian land.I have pulled all these questions directly from messages that YOU guys have sent me in the past month. My number one tip in meeting like-minded girls is to seek out another lesbian to be your wingwoman. We're perpetually thirsty for fresh gay blood, so being new on the scene actually works in your favor. It's safe to assume the people at the gay bar are gay. Remember, the homo bar is your territory, and you should feel empowered on your turf. No one is going to know you're gay just by looking at you (everyone rocks short hair and flannel these days), so make sure everywhere you go, you slip in your sexual identity.Maybe it was my aloofness that drew in the dudes (straight girls take note), but damn, dudes were easy like ~Sunday morning~.All you have to do is bat a lash, act entirely disinterested, cold and bitchy, and boys will fall at your feet.